so about the espresso

[cardsharked]

Username/Display Name: un: vierge / dn: odette
Server Channel: #general
Time: Late October, right after the espresso heist

Figure some of you might be wondering what the fuck happened to the espresso machine.

Well, I like at least one of you, so I’m willing to share the scoop.

Astarion the Victorian orphan trapped in a grown man’s body and some blond guy I haven’t seen around before broke the damn thing trying to lift it. Literally and figuratively. Dropped it a few feet from the door in the middle of grand theft bean.

I gathered anyone missing their fix would appreciate the heads up. You see Astarion or that tentacle-wielding lug around, be sure to thank em for making mornings more interesting. I’d like to personally extend my thanks to blondie, too, so if you know who around here can do that kind of kraken shit, don't be shy.

And if you think they’re just gonna replace the machine, you’re dead wrong. Bennet put up a cute little “pardon our mess” card, so we’re SOL. What's a girl to do?

Comments

un: satorumon

[unliminal]

[ ]

Damn!
That's a shame
You tried to stop them it sounds like?

[cardsharked]

[Careful, iCarly, lest she find out you were involved...]

Hell yeah I did. Not like they did anything to convince me to look the other way.

un: sole of the deep

[warmaid]

Do you know why they tried to take it?

[cardsharked]

sure as shit wasn't to use it

[Unless it was and Astarion dropped the ball - and the espresso machine - so badly that the game was up before it started.]

Even after it hit the ground they didn't just cut their losses and run. First guess would be they wanted something on the inside, but it's not like they seemed all that mechanically on the up.

un: mister joker

[survivaltricks]

[he may be a coffee freak but he hasn't yet visited the cafeteria to see that the espresso machine is gone yet, S O. . .]








WHAT

[cardsharked]

Hard to believe, ain't it?

un: elderflower

[airdnd]

[ actually, ]

Mister Astarion is from Baldur's Gate, last I'd heard, not Victoria.

Though I don't think I know who fits the description of the other you've described...

[ But she sure is getting an inkling (pun intended) based on someone with a tentaclecore aesthetic engaging in casual thievery... ]

Regrettable, that this all happened. It looks like rather a complex piece of machinery, too, so it would no doubt take time to repair or replace....

[cardsharked]

[she will remember who you're loyal to, heartleaf]

It's cause he

you know what? never mind. [This is a battle she and her surprisingly high wis score will be leaving for another day.]

You getting a taste for espresso, tiger? I wouldn't be surprised if we're gonna have to do without for the rest of the month. What a headache, huh?

un: paradisaea

[ohthehumanities]

[>some blond guy

NOW HOLD ON]

In case anyone gets any strange misconceptions, it wasn't me. I didn't even know it was missing.

[He doesn't even know what an espresso machine is!!!]

[cardsharked]

[We'll say this is pre-Winter-outing as she closely scrutinizes his userpic.]

Nah, I'm thinking you're a little too delicate for this kinda work.


on the other hand, this guy DID have a lot of trouble lifting that tiny old machine...

1/2 (not here yet)

[recluserose]

[Hm. This is supposed to be a vacation right? Her teacher tendencies shouldn't have to kick into overdrive at this petty thievery of the espresso machine. Sure Ms. Amelia Steinbeck is a smart cookie who immediately deduces who the second perpetrator is. The "Victorian orphan" is her neighbor. Oh well, this isn't her nonsense to deal with.

This should be solved by the hotel staff. They have so many floors and are able to provide for so many, surely replacing the machine shouldn't be such a big deal, it's such a common—

And then she reads the rest of Odette's message.

. . . ]

un: steinbeck

[recluserose]

[Oh their ass is grass.]

The blonde man isn't usually blonde. I believe he's Mr. Winter.

un: astarion

[astarion]

this is defamaation
you cant prove anything

[survivaltricks]

how dare you

[recluserose]

I know where you live.

[unliminal]

nah
you're super guilty
fess up already

un: summer

[icyspicy]

[ Whether or not this is before Amelia outed him, it doesn't matter. He's pretending it didn't happen. ]

Surely thaty's not the only soruce of espresso in the whole hotel.

[unliminal]

it was actually!
I checked every floor
🤷‍♂️

[ He absolutely did not. ]

[cardsharked]

[for our purposes, we'll say this is after]

how's your head, sucker?

un: headmaid

[fixtures]

"SOL"?

May I ask what you mean by this?

Re: un: headmaid

[cardsharked]

Yeah, yeah, for you old-fashioneds: shit outta luck.

You want the crash course?

[We'll make the maid a millennial or die trying.]

un: minato

[messianic]

[reading all of this chaos with a perpetual '?' over his head.]

But it's all free, right? Why would someone want to steal it?

Re: un: minato

[cardsharked]

Think you're looking at the reason, kid.

[airdnd]

[ well, now that she has the intel!! ]

Minato, that would be because because your sensei put them up to it.

un: kotone

[alternativity]

The punishment should fit the crime, right?
They should be put in a room with all the people who really miss coffee and let them...
Espresso themselves.

[ Kotone no. ]

[survivaltricks]

i think whoever is responsible deserves a good







roast