so about the espresso

[cardsharked]

Username/Display Name: un: vierge / dn: odette
Server Channel: #general
Time: Late October, right after the espresso heist

Figure some of you might be wondering what the fuck happened to the espresso machine.

Well, I like at least one of you, so I’m willing to share the scoop.

Astarion the Victorian orphan trapped in a grown man’s body and some blond guy I haven’t seen around before broke the damn thing trying to lift it. Literally and figuratively. Dropped it a few feet from the door in the middle of grand theft bean.

I gathered anyone missing their fix would appreciate the heads up. You see Astarion or that tentacle-wielding lug around, be sure to thank em for making mornings more interesting. I’d like to personally extend my thanks to blondie, too, so if you know who around here can do that kind of kraken shit, don't be shy.

And if you think they’re just gonna replace the machine, you’re dead wrong. Bennet put up a cute little “pardon our mess” card, so we’re SOL. What's a girl to do?

Comments

un: summer

[icyspicy]

That's qiote the claim. I'd look awful as a bnlonde.

[recluserose]

I also know where you live.

[icyspicy]

Yes, and? If oyu want to come over alkl you have to do is ask.

[recluserose]

[IGNORING THAT]

Just one question: why the espresso machine??

Do you even know what it's for??

[icyspicy]

You are still making assumotions my dear. I didn't steal anything.

[recluserose]

Do you even have espresso where you're from?

[icyspicy]

We have coffee. Are they niot the same thign?

[recluserose]

Absolutely not.

Espresso is a concentrated form of coffee with a richer flavor due to the finer grind of beans and less water. The are not the same! Coffee is extracted from a coarser grind using more water in comparison. A good shot of espresso or more is significant in the makeup of other cafe-related drinks!

Read this and reflect on your idiocy!

Or not since you were apparently slammed in the head by Ms. Odette. I believe that will make the reflecting rather challenging.

[there winter got the full teacher lecture]

[icyspicy]

[ It's a good think Amelia isn't his neighbor, or she'd be hearing the uproarious way he's laughing right now. ]

SO sorry. Please forvige my ignorance, Sensei.

[recluserose]

I highly doubt you're sorry but I'll take what I can get.

Especially since we all have to wait for a new espresso machine.

[icyspicy]

Oh I am especially nto sorry for the espresso machine.

[ SUFFER. ]

[recluserose]

[Amelia will remember that!]

I'd admire your moxy more if the heist had been successful.

[warmaid]

I didn't know the difference before now. Thank you for the information.

[Unlike Winter, she's 10000% sincere.]

[recluserose]

You're welcome Miss Kokomi.

You can now also understand why the loss of the espresso machine is most dire.

[warmaid]

Even before I was informed of the difference, I could tell that the loss of the machine has been terrible for morale.

[survivaltricks]

you can't fool me with your cleverly juxtaposed username

[icyspicy]

But you agree it IS clever?

[survivaltricks]

[damn it]




yeah.

irony is fashionable.

[icyspicy]

Oh goods. I'd hate to me out of fashion.

[survivaltricks]

you also can't fool me with your clever change in subject.

[icyspicy]

No one's trying to fook anyone. Therw's not a world out there where I could pull off blonde. I'd wash right out.

[survivaltricks]

fook

[H E H]

[icyspicy]

whoops 😂

[survivaltricks]

heh

i guess i am successfully distracted by funny typos

[FOOK!!!]

[icyspicy]

Then my ploy was a success.